PEOPLE AROUND US

Sometimes we find ourselves
in the company of folks
who don’t realize the sensitivity
around making fat jokes.
They make comments like
”At least my boobs are bigger than my tum”
and
”If I keep eating this, I’ll get a huge bum”
It particularly hurts
when family is the one
Like they don’t care to see your experience
”Why can’t you loosen up.”
”It’s just a joke.”
”I’m just having fun.”
Every comment that’s made
is like a chip to the soul
It erodes our thick skin
and definitely takes a toll.
So, it’s important to have
a mantra or two
To remind yourself that
their beliefs about bodies aren’t about you.
And I know it still feels
like daggers to the heart
every time they make a comment
you want to come apart.
Many people simply didn’t learn the ways
of learning how to undo fatphobia
through thought work and HAES
But we can take their comments
and use them as fuel
to create change in a world
that seems set on being cruel.
While we may want to tell them
why what they are doing is bad
Shame doesn’t help anyone
and there’s better techniques to be had.
Simply ask them questions, like
”What’s wrong if your stomach is bigger than your chest?”
or
”Where did you learn that a certain shape of body is best?”
While the pain might still linger
we have to know
that we can’t control others
SO:
We have to start to ask ourselves
”What truth do I believe
in the words that they are speaking?
What will help me find relief?”
”What in me is this comment hitting?”
and
”What kinds of boundaries have I been setting?”
No, it’s not easy
when it’s people we know
But we always have a choice:
Should I stay or should I go?
Everyone’s experiences with bodies are different & vast
So it’s important we look inward
to understand most of it,
for everyone,
is rooted in the past.
But in order for us,
to move forward unscathed
We need to learn how to find peace in ourselves
That’s how we’ll be saved.
It’s important for you
to become resilient and strong
and know that your glorious body
isn’t bad or wrong.