Taking Health Seriously
It has been no surprise to me that I have become a victim of my own circumstance. After removing myself from diet culture, I simply found myself in hustle culture - using the exact same techniques and ploys as diet culture, just in a different fashion. I talked about that in more detail here. But as a result of me not listening to my body, overriding her needs and desires I now find myself in this squidgy spot of having to rebalance my hormones, to shift my eating and drinking behaviors, and to look at movement, stress reduction and the impact of sleep on my health. I’ve avoided it long enough and now, since having Covid and getting the vaccines a lot of things have flared up for me (not saying these CAUSED it, it could also be the stress related to these things as well) my eczema is out of control, I have terrible heart burn with certain foods, and my joints ache like crazy (but only some of them). The repetitive photography/editing injuries are limiting my strength and I am aging (which I am thankful for). The reality is is that I do need to consider the implications of my health if I want to keep doing the work I am doing - but I need to do through methods that aren’t filtered by the veil of morality.
So what does this look like for me?
Well, I am going to turn myself into my next project. I am going to venture into the idea of bio-hacking, better understanding my body and its specific needs, and getting a reading on what the fuck is actually going on. This project is not going to be cheap, nor is it going to be exciting all the time. It is going to involve a lot of test taking, trial and error, paying attention, trying new things, sticking to a relatively structured schedule for data tracking purposes, and overall, learning how to truly listen (and respond) to my body’s requirements. I am also not going into it with any expectations aside from education and understanding!
A lot of this comes down to value and how I see myself, I am realizing. I recognize that I will eat certain foods because “I deserve them” but ultimately know that they end up making me feel worse in the long run - whether from quantity or quality. I have come to notice that despite my body desiring stretching or strength building, I will push that aside to make way for “busy work” that needs to get done because I feel guilty taking time for myself. I would rather mindlessly scroll for 30 minutes than do a 20 minute meditation to reset my mind - again, not believing that I am worth doing the meditation for. So, I am starting to think of myself as a puppy (since I want one anyways, I should make sure I can take care of myself before bringing another living being into the space!) Can I take myself out for walks? Can I listen to my body’s urges to use the bathroom instead of procrastinating it to finish up some work? Can I drink water when I’m thirsty, eat when I’m hungry and go without when I am bored? Can I sleep when my body requires it and can I create practices that ensure a less stressful life for myself so that I might be able to actually enjoy the life I’ve been blessed with? Can I learn more and shop less? Can I move my body because it feels good and not be lethargic because I don’t want to appear wear or “out of shape”?
Now, the next question is: Where do I begin?
Well, with most of my projects I will usually write a brief with the specific intent and purpose so I should probably do that for this:
Given physical activity, monitoring, nutrition, stress reduction & sleep, the participant will develop a better understanding of what is happening in and to her body; to the extent that she will be able to anticipate and accommodate her body’s needs to achieve optimal performance.
Well, shit. That sounds pretty cool! (And gets me excited to get going!) Now that I have my destination, I am tasked with finding out:
How do I monitor my physical activity, nutrition, stress reduction & sleep?
And for that I am looking into a few sources that have been recommended to me. Number 1 is the Oura Ring (which I am sure you have seen advertised around!) which isn’t cheap but looks top notch. There is also the option of a fitbit type situation but I’ve tried that in the past with minimal success of the info that I desire. I have also recently hear about this type of DNA test (not the kind that will tell me if I am 100% that bitch…) that will help determine my body’s needs in terms of supplementation, nutrition, etc. (Also VERY expensive). So I will be planning on these purchases in the future. The 3rd source is revisiting my naturopath to see what her recommendation is in regards to balancing my hormones. And lastly, I guess journaling/charting/tracking the way things feel when I move a certain way, eat a certain way, sleep a certain way, etc. (this is where the Oura Ring is helpful as it provides most of this info I think).
As a lover of data, trends, and statistics, I am excited to start tracking everything to see what happens. How does my sleep affect my spending? How does my nutrition impact my social media use? How does my fitness impact my creativity? Etc. I will keep you updated on this as I get going and if I find anything out, you will be the first to know!
Before I go, I want you to notice that NO WHERE did I talk about weight loss in the achievement of health. Should my body decide to let go of weight as I get closer to what my body authentically needs then that is what she will do, but if she doesn’t that’s okay. My body is desirable, loving, and glorious in any form she takes and health is not dictated by the mass one has on their body (regardless of the bullshit we’ve been fed through our lives.)
